In light of the trials of Enron, I thought it would be appropriate to post a conversation I had with a scam artist on instant messaging. It’s a bit of a long read so I bolded my lines and italicized the scammer. I wasn’t immediately aware they were a scammer but once this was evident I decided to try and keep them going as long as possible. I was particularly bored that day so I hope you are as amused reading this as I was in having the conversation:

scarey045: hey babe
cyng1976: hello hun
scarey045: how is you?
cyng1976: I am fine and u?

scarey045: just hangin out, doin nothin
cyng1976: where are u rigth now ?
scarey045: houston here, you?
cyng1976: I am still in west africa
scarey045: wow, that’s a few miles down the road
cyng1976: U are in the states rigth
scarey045: yep, texas
cyng1976: thats great
cyng1976: wanna come back someday
scarey045: where from are you?
cyng1976: I am from NJ
scarey045: cool>
cyng1976: Presently in Nigeria
scarey045: what took you to africa?
cyng1976: Well its a long story
scarey045: i have a short attention span, you can tell me but i’ll forget 90%
scarey045: hahahaha
cyng1976: really or kidding ?
scarey045: just kidding
scarey045: :P
cyng1976: this how it happened some days ago i heard a friend of my who lives in nigeria She had an Accident and she was in the hospital i had to move there to see her Health
cyng1976: when i arrived there i lost the hospital address and it was  night when I got there and i can"t get Flight at Night cos it too dangerous for me to go home at nigth
scarey045: wow
cyng1976:  i have to log in a hotel for me to go the next day in the MIdNight some Mens  came and attack me and stole all my money goods i brought In the Hotel and they Ran away
cyng1976: but they did not hurt me i try to Explain things to the Hotel but they will not believe me so they said all they need is there Money so right now am stucked in a Hotel in Nigeria
scarey045: sounds danger
cyng1976:  all i need now to get back to state is the Money to pay the Hotel Bill.
scarey045: i would kick there asses and tell them to loan you a dollar
cyng1976: Well baby if u can loan me it will be better they wont do that here they are very bad here
scarey045: bad people should have an ass kicked
cyng1976: Well this is a no mans Land
cyng1976: I am powerless over this
scarey045: no man should be the ass kicked king
cyng1976: Baby only if u could help me out
scarey045: baby got back
cyng1976: how do u mean baby?
scarey045: you know, back, baby got back
cyng1976: I dont understand what the got back means
scarey045: it’s not important to your situation
cyng1976: ok baby
cyng1976: baby would u help?
scarey045: how much baby help does baby need?
cyng1976: baby its for $800 to get my Visa passport back from the hotel management
cyng1976: they have it until I pay
cyng1976: thats why I cant fly back home
scarey045: hotel management has baby’s back
cyng1976: Yes they said I migth sneek out if they dont seeze my international Passport that I have my Visa on it
cyng1976: if i pay today I can move out of here and face home tomorrow
scarey045: which way does baby’s home face?
cyng1976: NJ if thats cool with u or if u want me to  pay u visit for days then before i face home
cyng1976: how do u want it ?
scarey045: if you pay them, then baby got back home
cyng1976: Yes baby
scarey045: but maybe baby take a money to the bank baby
cyng1976: money to what bank?
cyng1976: I dont have the money baby
scarey045: but maybe not need money
scarey045: can you ride a boat from nigeria to usa?
cyng1976: baby I dont have the money thats why i am asking u to help
cyng1976: oh thats not possible
cyng1976: only planes
scarey045: but planes are to "scarey"
cyng1976: oh nope thats how i got her
cyng1976: i prfer plane
cyng1976: baby would u loan me the $800?
scarey045: but i would be afraid, what if baby falls out of airplane door, who would catch you?
cyng1976: Nope it wont happen
cyng1976: we belt sit ourselves and planes are always locked
cyng1976: u never fly in the plane before?
scarey045: i prefer swimming
cyng1976: lol well its not possible to get in the boat from Nigeria to USA
cyng1976: baby u have not answered me yet
cyng1976: would u loan me the $800?
cyng1976: If I get it then its not a problem for me to get on plane and I will just have to land in the nearest airport to u
scarey045: but i’m far from N.J., then you would ask more money to ride car back to N.J.  baby got back….baby not got much money
cyng1976: nope I will come to u directly
cyng1976: I wont go to NJ
scarey045: $800?
cyng1976: yes baby
cyng1976: Then u will just come and pick me at the airport
cyng1976: I will send u fligth infomation u will know time and date that I am Landing
scarey045: but i don’t have a car, i would have to give you 50 cents to ride the bust.  that means $800.50.  that’s too much money now.  money can’t buy me love
cyng1976: Yes baby I am not buying Love I am coming to show u real Love baby
cyng1976: I am refunding money back as soon as I start work back
scarey045: what professional are you?
cyng1976: economist
cyng1976: u baby?
scarey045: i work online
scarey045: i’m a professional chat person
cyng1976: chat online only and how does that pay u baby?
scarey045: it’s ok, hey can i borrow about $700? rentals for baby
cyng1976: Ok baby I guess I will sell my gold chain to balance the rest up
cyng1976: I appreciate it alot
scarey045: you have a chain?
cyng1976: The chain I was wearing when the armed robbers came
cyng1976: that was the only valuable thing they didnt take away
scarey045: how much is it worth?
cyng1976: not more than 100bucks as I asked from a gold smith before
scarey045: if you send it to me i can get $400 for it
cyng1976: baby I dont have money to send it to u and besides u said u will help with $700 then I will sell it and add it up
scarey045: i didn’t say i would give you $700, i asked you to give me $700